I'm A Celebrity will grind to a halt tonight with Christopher Biggins being crowned jungle king (don't hold us to that but it looks likely).
Celebritish has tried to stay up to date with the goings on in the jungle but frankly life gets in the way so we really have no idea whats going on.
Apparently it's just Biggins, Janice Dickinson and J (is he still 'J from Five' or is he famous enough to be 'J' now?) left in the jungle, so the fight is between a panto king and an ex-model. Oh the glamour.
There we have it, another year of I'm A Celeb and this one was more boring than ever. Any chance of romance was stamped out by ITV letting Marc Bannerman leave (bring back vote rigging, we say). And you can put as many Gemma Atkinson's in the jungle as you like but all they add is wank-fodder for Zoo magazine.
Speaking of which, Gemma has been giving insightful interviews since being booted out:
“I lost a stone in there, so I need to stock up on food now. Thankfully I didn’t lose it from my breasts, which is the main thing – I didn’t want to lose them.”
How you would "lose" implants by dropping a stone we don't know, but thank goodness eh?
“I’m really looking forward to learning how to kiss again with Marcus [Bent]. It’ll be like having butterflies on a first date again.”
Christ, she is so lacking in brain cells she has forgotten how to kiss in 3 weeks?! Also, "having butterflies on a first date"? We normally go for a prawn cocktail but each to their own.
We have a suspicion IACGMOOH might come to an end in a year or two just as Celebrity Big Brother has. It seems the public are deserting pointless celebrity reality TV and going for quality shows like Strictly Come Dancing instead. Hooray for Bruce Forsyth, saviour of British television!
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