Showing posts with label Daniel Bedingfield. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Daniel Bedingfield. Show all posts

Thursday, 6 March 2008

Don't you know who I am? Erm, no


Poor old Daniel Bedingfield. Proving fame is a fickle mistress indeed, Bedders was nearly turned away from the Paper shiteclub because the bouncers had not a clue who he was. Lucky old bouncers, eh?

When Dan decided he'd Gotta Get Thru This queue of ordinary folk by exploiting his ever-waning celebrity status, the bouncers told him: "If You're Not The One you ain't comin' in."

Finally, however, the bouncers relented and let him in. Maybe he wore them down by singing at them, like when the Americans played the Barney The Dinosaur theme tune on repeat to weaken terror suspects.

Monday, 3 March 2008

Bedingfield's boo boo



Here is Daniel Bedingfield rocking the red carpet on Saturday night at the Black Entertainment Television launch party. Quite why he was there we don't know, as far as we're aware he isn't black or entertaining but don't quote us on that.

We're still waiting for news on his next album but if this sartorial faux pas is anything to go by we're expecting an Arctic-Monkeys-living-on-the-streets kind of vibe, with a bit of Charlie Chaplin chucked in for good measure.

Strangely there was no mention of his rather unsuccessful foray into construction work last week which resulted in the destruction of a luxury home in Broadstairs.

Thursday, 6 December 2007

Daniel Bedingfield's mental issues


A charming little piece in the London Lite yesterday about Daniel Bedingfield — you know, the one who sang about Getting Thru This, then got upstaged by his prettier but equally irritating sister and nearly died in some sort of accident. Anyway, the theme of this interview should really have signified to Daniel from the off that he is a Z-list deadbeat. It was not to do with him, his music, or his career in any way. It was to do with why he likes living in Dulwich.

Somehow, Daniel managed to turn this mundane little piece of property fluff into a rant about how difficult it is being famous. But how would he know, you ask? Well, we're baffled too, but apparently:

"I’ve had to move homes in the area because I’ve had stalkers and even neighbours coming to my door
asking for an autograph."

Um, okay then Dan, tell you what, next time don't set up home next to a mental hospital. He goes on:

"I’m an immensely private person. I wasn’t before but now I have to be."

Er, why, exactly? Even properly famous people like Graham Norton and John Barrowman have enhanced their popularity by being candid. We can only assume Bedingfield has to be private because he's hiding a secret of such deep, dark depravity that it would haul even his Z-list ass onto the front pages and straight into jail. And we could be right:

"Last night, I played Dare with some mates and someone had to fill up a sock with sand and then suck it for a minute."

What japes! Anyone who thinks this is a good party game is clearly capable of all sorts of horrific crimes against humanity, not to mention crimes against humour, intelligence and fun.

Thursday, 18 October 2007

Where are they now?

In this, the first of an irregular series, we blow the dust from our vintage copies of Heat magazine and bring you updates on the whereabouts of celebrities from yesteryear.



Daniel Bedingfield [Da-neel Bed-in-feel] Pronunciation

1. has an annoying sister
2. whines like a girl when dumped.
3. writes power ballads with prowess
4. has got to get through this.
[Origin: 2001]

I recieved a press release today from a someone called Ilana in which was a piece of information so amazing that I had to catch my breath.

"Music Box - 2Play album launch party
Le Pigalle Club, 215-217 Piccadilly, London, W1
Daniel Bedingfield, 2Play
Co-hosts and plays low-key set (Bedingfield) at launch celebrating dance act's (2Play) latest album..."

Thats right, after years in the wilderness, Daniel is returning to play a concert helping to launch someone called 2Play (perhaps the dance act in question had discovered 4Play already taken?).

Quite why Bedders picked this event to make his comeback is unclear but I think we can rest assured that "low-key" will mean he'll be wearing ripped jeans and will be accompanied by a classical guitarist. Lets hope he's still up to the job and can wrestle back the Bedingfield crown from his vile sister Natasha.

Joe