Wednesday, 16 January 2008

What she really, really wants

Celebritish today received a press release headed thus:

Lianne Morgan (Original Spice Girl) Seeks Band.

Yes, some poor bint actually has these words trailing after her name, like the deformed, retarded cousin of pHd or MPhil. Very sad.

Still, Lianne is back on the road and looking for a band, a band with the following qualities no less:
"can sing backing vocals like Aretha Franklin, play lead guitar like Joe Satrini, piano like Burt Bacharach, base guitar like the funky soul madina, and a drummer with class and slick style."

We'll ignore the three glaring misspellings of names and instruments, but we do like the way that they run out of famous musos to mention toward the end - clearly naming a famous drummer is a bridge too far for Lianne.

Still a bit of advice for anyone who might be thinking of auditioning: if you really can sing like Aretha or play like Satrini (sic) or Bacharach, you might like to think about aiming a bit higher than hooking up with a woman who was replaced by Mel C.

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